Traveling Through the Wilderness of Grief

The last few days have taken the wind right out of my sails. Strange that an event an ocean away could have such an effect on one old desert gal. Of course, it’s my heart that accepts the sorrow as my own. Once, very long ago, I was a Maui Babe. A rat pack of four women celebrating a 50th birthday of the youngest of us.

I never moved up the rank to be a Maui Goddess like my dear friend, the Goddess of the Central Coast. Nope. I’ve been happy to be a Maui Babe all these years. One of four in our royal court.

So many of the places now reduced to ash held special memories for me. It was at “Burger’s in Paradise” that we discovered the birthday girl had a special guy in her life. A wonderful man that would befriend us all from that day forward. I formed a spiritual connection with the Old Banyan, covering a city block. If she could’ve only shared her stories with me, I’d tell you now. I couldn’t get enough of the clean air and trade winds. We made the best memories cherished to this day.

VST and I visited Maui on other occasions and made memories of our own. Standing at the very site of Lindbergh’s grave was almost as amazing as the drive to get there. Lindbergh’s grave is marked with a simple granite slab laid upon lava stones in the yard behind the church. The epitaph is a quote from the Bible: ‘If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea.’ . Psalms 139:9

The beginning of the Psalm is as follows:

You have searched me, LORD, and you know me.

You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.

Before a word is on my tongue you, LORD, know it completely.

You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?

If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,

even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. (Psalms 139:1-10 -NIV)

Remembered is the wonderful dinner enjoyed at Mama’s Fish Hut, or the hilarious day VST humored me, agreeing to take a hula class. Memories that connect my heart to a devastated little island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

I’ve learned one important lesson at this early stage of this tragedy. When vacationing, I’ll give careful consideration to Disaster Preparedness in the area. It’s easy to get lulled into a belief that tragedy can’t possibly occur in paradise. It does. It just did.

When vacationing, have a plan. Many people left their documents in hotel rooms to which they couldn’t return. Hard to get a flight out without a driver’s license and credit card. People were separated from important medications. Not too hard to carry a couple doses of medication if it’s truly essential. Have a plan. If you separate from travel companions, choose a “meet up” spot and time. Tell people where you’re going and when you’ll return. You just never know……

This weekend, I plan to spend time in my garden and focus on all things Winterpast. As always, she is here to comfort me through grief. Her demands are simple. Water my gardens. Fertilize my roots. Take time to rest in the shade of my trees. Set down your burden for a little while and get to work. Autumn is just around the corner.

I’ll be back on Monday.