Good Morning,
I’m Oliver. I’ve heard there are lots of stories about me floating around the web. To set the story straight, I thought I’d wake up for a little while and let you know the truth about what goes on around here. I’m a 4 1/2 year old standard cream piebald wirehaired dachshund. If I let myself go, I can look like this.
Except that I have a liver-colored nose AND green eyes. I can get a lot by begging with my eyes. Have you heard about my MM? Well, he’s really a softy. I’ve trained him to give me treats after meals when I’m around. My girlfriend, Wookie, and I have that dialed in.
My favorite things include my frequent trips to puppy camp. Mom-Oh and I are so excited when it’s my time to go. Melissa, my friend there, always has great activities. I get to swim. Sometimes we even take pictures and I pose really cute. A couple of weeks ago, there was huge summer storm and Corine let me play in the rain. I always have fun at puppy camp.
Life around Winterpast is pretty cool. I let Mom-Oh think she makes the rules, but we both know I have her trained really well. She never forgets to prepare my food twice a day. When I stand at the pantry door, I get a Greenie. I have bones hidden all over the house. I try to keep them hidden because Mom-Oh trips on stuff. I want you all to know I really try hard to be good.
Sometimes, there are smells and sounds that are so interesting, I need to follow them. When the garage is open, I can’t help it. I just love running across the street to visit the neighbor’s house. This upsets Mom-Oh, but, a dog’s got to do what a dog’s got to do. There might be badgers over there. Or TOADS. I LOVE toads.
Father’s Day, we were hanging out with my MM and Wookie. It was a great day. Wookie and I were “behaving”, whatever that means. Late in the afternoon, Mom-Oh had to go out for a minute and my MM was making dinner. I was more interested in the kitchen than the front door and stuck with my MM. Like glue. Like a shadow. He’s the best guy in the whole world. Wookie and I both know that. I guess Mom-Oh thinks he’s okay, too.
Anyway, there was chicken involved. I love me some chicken. My MM took a package and left the kitchen so I followed him. I mean, who wouldn’t.
C-H-I-C-K-E-N.
A few minutes later, Mom-Oh came back.
Now, I couldn’t hear everything, but let me tell you something. Mom-Oh was talking some smack about me. Yes she was. She might have even said some bad words. Something like, “How could he?” “He’s in trouble” She even said I was “ungrateful”. Yikes.
Mom-Oh and my MM started calling my name all upset-like. Well, I was right there waiting like a good dog. I heard them clapping and my MM was even whistling. I like it when he does that. It means, “Come quick, I have something to eat.” I waited like a good dog. My treat would taste so good.
After the front door closed, their voices got really, really far away. There were other voices, too. Like a lot of other voices. Kind of a party. Everyone was calling my name in funny kinds of ways. Wow. People are sure stupid. I was right there waiting for them and getting ready for some kind of treat. There was nothing else to do but take a nap until they came back. And, finally, they did.
Mom-Oh was telling on me to T and K. She was tuned up now. Something about me being the last dog. Well, let me tell you, I hope I am. Mom-Oh and I are a pair. Wookie is a great friend, but we can’t get carried away with any other dogs. Wookie and I have it pretty good the way it is.
Well, it was over an hour now. Even though Mom-Oh was sure mad, I could tell her heart was breaking. I know her pretty well, since we’ve been together 4 1/2 years now. We’ve been through some stuff together. I was getting worried, too. It was dark and I was ready to play with Wookie. Where was she? I wouldn’t bark because we’ve been working on “NO BARKING”. So, I waited quietly in the dark.
All of a sudden, the door by which I sat opened and it was my MM!!! My hero!!!!! I ran out of the garage so darn fast.
WOOKIE!!!
MOM-OH!!!
Where have you all been? I just followed my MM into the garage to put the extra chicken in the freezer. I thought he’d give me a treat for being a good dog. But, instead, I got trapped in there.
Well, Mom-Oh was pretty happy. She hugged me a bunch. She kissed me, too, on the top of my head. My MM gave me another treat!! Wookie and I did zoomies to make everyone laugh. Everyone was extra happy to have me back. I don’t get it. I was just waiting by the door the entire time.
I heard poor MM tell Mom-Oh he walked six blocks. I wonder what’s there? I might have to find out the next time we visit him. The neighbors all know what I look like now. I heard Mom-Oh and my MM tell them. It’s nice to be loved.
So, whatever you do today, remember two things. You can get a Greenie if you look really, really cute and sit nice. It’s all in the eye contact. And, if you follow someone for chicken, make sure you don’t get locked in the garage. It just makes everyone happier that way.
Thanks for reading.
Signing out,
Sir Oliver of Ashworth Hall of the High Desert Plains of Northwestern Nevada
