Sunset or Sunrise? A Personal Perspective

I wake up to a scene like this every morning here on the high desert plains of Northwestern Nevada. To the east, the sun peaks over the barren mountains, causing the sage to be drenched in early morning color. Awe inspiring, evert day I thank God that I live in this quiet and beautiful place. From here I will go to meet Him one day. In the evening the scene repeats itself as the sun sets behind the Sierra Nevada Mountains just to the west of me. And the seasons, they’ve gone round and round.

Either time of day is breathtaking. A day rich with possibilities or a day that has been filled with accomplishments through struggles and perseverance. Two different times to reflect on what the hours of light held for each one of us. Each individual creates their own story during those hours. Depending on what we learn from our waking hours, a personal path is formed. Sometimes there are some pretty scary forks in the road. It is at a life defining juncture I stand now.

I have chosen to resign and retire from teaching.

A sunrise took me to a little school at the wide spot on a very dusty road on a very hot day in July. Hired by a principal that, along with ten teachers, quit the next week, I might have taken a different path had I known the backstory. But, hind sight is 20/20, and we can never make good decisions based on the experiences and actions of others.

God gave me 20 littles to teach with love for the time I had them under my wing. We all learned a lot during the two months I had them in my care, and with pride, I can say they were always my focus. For those weeks, they got it all. Up at dark-thirty, I spent time preparing days that were the best they could be, but extenuating circumstances finally broke me. I refer to this as “Death of a Teacher in 60 Days or Less”.

Some might think their energy level was too much to handle.

Nope. I found it refreshing and delightful.

Some might think it was the computerized lessons that pushed me to my breaking point.

Nope. I learned a lot from the experience.

It was a set of circumstances so broken that they were not to be fixed during my employ.

One very green teacher reminded me that the situation in which we were all teaching was all they knew, therefore, not unusual or wrong. There lies the demise of things as they once were. Accepting insanity as the new normal. I couldn’t participate with the insanity called public school one minute longer.

In my beautiful teaching career, I spent the bulk of my career blessed to teach at an award winning school. People would travel from all over California and Nevada to observe our reading lab and literacy program. All employees were onboard and our students reaped the rewards. Every student’s educational plan was tailor-made just for them and the goal of every employee was student success. Educational minutes were golden and not to be squandered. I know what that looks like in a community and more specifically, in a school district.

When I became Secondary Teacher of the Year in 2010, nothing made me more proud. I earned that award while helping high school students achieve their very real dreams and goals. During those years with my district, I watched the best of the best teachers work their magic while loving every second of our days together. The brilliance of my time teaching will never be tarnished by poor working conditions and even worse educational decisions made by people that should know better.

It was never about the paycheck. It wasn’t about prestige. I wanted to have one more school year with littles. It proved to be too much. My career passed away into memories that I will cherish for the rest of my life. For a little time, I will grieve the loss while knowing my resignation was the right decision for me. If I hadn’t taken a chance at a new sunrise, I would have regretted that. I’m very glad I gave this my best and last shot.

Life is a series of sunrises and sunsets. The sun set on a wonderful time in my life in which I was The One and Only Mrs. Hurt. Now, I return to retirement with a new appreciation for all the opportunities that await. A sunrise brightening the mountains and presenting a day ripe with possibilities. How rich and wonderful!

While making this decision, I spoke at length with someone I met a very long time ago on a playground far, far away. Poppy. Although not her real name, she has a very REAL place in my heart. You see, when she was only 8, she declared that she and I were HEART FRIENDS. She went on to say that there aren’t many people that are that lucky to find a HEART FRIEND.

I chose Poppy for her name, because like the California poppies that color the foothills every spring, this girl was a force to be reckoned with. A child strong and brilliant beyond her years. A child that has forged herself into steel as she walked through a fiery childhood. She is a once-in-a-lifetime HEART FRIEND.

Through the years, Nikki and I have found and lost and found each other again. Through her strength and resilience while homeless most of her educational years, Nikki schooled herself, graduating with honors in high school, UCLA, Penn State, and now, finishing her doctoral program at University of North Carolina. I’m blessed that Nikki is my HEART FRIEND. We talked about my decision to resign from my teaching position.

Torn up about leaving my students in the middle of the year, she said the most beautiful thing to me.

“Joy, those kids are so blessed to have you teach them for two months. You didn’t cause their troubles and you can’t fix them either. You came at the right time in their lives and they were so lucky to spend any time at all with you. They were a lucky class to be with you.”

There is a golden crown a teacher gets to wear very few moments in her life. An almost-30-year-old-student looking back to say you were HER teacher. That you made a HUGE difference. That she loved you then, throughout the years, now, and forever more. That is the shimmery bow that ties up my career. Thank you, my HEART FRIEND. I owe you for the council.

As you can imagine, this week has been one of the most intense since the passing of VST. I need to change gears and celebrate a bright new chapter in my life. I promise I will be back on Monday with new stories from this wide spot on a very dusty road running through the high desert plains of Northwestern Nevada. Know I’ll be celebrating all the upcoming sunrises and sunsets my life has left with new appreciation. Don’t worry. I plan to celebrate my REAL and FINAL retirement in rare form. Stay tuned.

More on Monday.