Rain. Beautiful rain. As I write this, the rain is falling on Winterpast creating a relaxing atmosphere. Wonderful, because life right now is anything but relaxing. As Adele says, “I created this storm, it’s only fair I have to sit in its rain”. Such are the crazy days I spend under the weight of work related demands.
The children are my rock. 20 littles that are trying their very best to do their very best. They have finished all their initial testing, which took focus and thought. I’m proud to say not one hurried through, and because of that, I have a very high scoring group. That being said, they are littles that have more energy than I could have imagined. Rain yesterday cost them another recess. Keeping children busy for hours on end is an exhausting art. I’m hoping the rain this morning is gone by recess time this afternoon.
The bureaucracy, on the other hand, will be the reason I will truly retire with a party and trip to Hawaii planned for June. It will be the party I should have had but never did. One with BBQ, friends, music, and laughter. This time, I am sure. No more. I have hit the organizational wall and will not longer subject myself to moronic demands. As VST would have commented, “The juice ain’t worth the squeeze, Darlin’.”
In my darker moments, I’ve hoped for terrible evaluations. Performance evals so bad that the district will never hire me back if I ever get the insane idea to try this again. Hahahaha. Don’t worry. I’m sure you all remember how the A- nearly did me in this summer. Giving my all is how I role in the classroom. My students were given to me by God and I can see reasons why we’re spending these next months together. They need me as much as I need them. Any other craziness is just that and I will ignore as much as I can.
Of course, today is payday. That sweetens the experience a wee bit. Money was never the driving force, but I won’t complain about the automatic deposit once a month. I just wanted to teach one more year. Ah, if only it were that simple.
Winterpast is a lonely place these days with Oliver in puppy camp. Mysterious Marine has been keeping me fed and in laughter during the evening hours with dinner invitations. To have a gentleman know his way around the kitchen is something I haven’t experienced in my entire life. My Dad was too busy. VST juggled everything he could throughout our 32 years together. The kitchen is still a foreign land to me, especially when I’m exhausted at the end of the day. Just like that, in walks the most adorable guy in his Levi’s and t-shirt to whip up a little steak and lobster, just because.
Just yesterday, the seasonal shift caused my automatic tire sensors to alert me to low air pressure in two tires. Just like that, this adorable Marine came to my rescue to correct my tire pressure. Yes. Of course I could have done it myself. I’m learning I don’t need to do everything myself. Independence is a heavy cross. It’s nice to finally know the guy that can help at a moment’s notice.
Oy Vey in the very best way.
With autumn here, I need to dig out my sweaters, turtle necks, jeans, and hoodies. Two weeks ago, it was 104. This morning, 50 degrees in the middle of a downpour. That’s desert life.
Two days ago, as I left Winterpast, there was the most beautiful rainbow behind my house. The end was right there, just beyond the hill where I set VST free in that violent windstorm early in the summer. I took that as a sign. Everything really is as good as it seems, and it doesn’t get better than this. Busy days and happy evenings. I don’t know what pieces of the puzzle are yet to be found, but they are the happy ones I’ve been searching for. Of that, I have no doubt.
As for evaluations, testing, and other meaningless crap, it will come and go. Maybe I will make deadlines and maybe those deadlines will just pass silently with no comment from me. At this point it doesn’t matter. They can always fire me and I wouldn’t complain.
Whatever you do today, look for hidden rainbows. Life is wonderful. If we didn’t learn another lesson through the horrors of Covid, we should’ve learned that every single second is a blessing. Choose wisely those things that are important, and ignore those that are meaningless. Always choose a smile over a furrowed brow. Worry just makes us old before our time.
More tomorrow.
PS — To K — Today, you are free from some pretty heavy chains. Time to dance in the rain, Miss Skinny!!!! Can’t wait for the 7th!!!!!