At 6:18 last night, the direction of my life changed with one little phone call from a pretty amazing principal. Principals work very long hours, spending their days analyzing all sorts of things. From soothing a scratched knee on the play ground to smoothing ruffled feathers of disgruntled staff and parents, it’s a thankless job. I have my administrative credential, but after all these years it remains virginal. Being a Principal is a thankless job. I’d take 20 kids and a chalk board over that job any day of the week.
Yesterday was filled with trouble. Finally turning over the reins to God, his strength carried me into the evening hours. Somedays are like that. Suffice it to say, I navigated through some very rough waters while remaining focused on my truths, values, and heart. Tough decisions are just that. Choices that must sit well in one’s heart and on one’s conscious. Life isn’t always easy.
Jagger and Richards nailed it when they sang….
You can't always get what you want You can't always get what you want You can't always get what you want But if you try sometimes you might find You get what you need
Everything became clear when I focused on who I am at the core. I am a serious, accomplished, beautiful, and unique teacher-woman. I will not waste my remaining earthly minutes on undeserving endeavors. The time has come for me to aim my arrow straight at the bull’s eye of life. Being a great shot, I had one arrow and it hit the mark.
To clear my mind, I’d resumed installing more door handles. I’m getting pretty experienced. It takes ten minutes to change a handle. I smiled to see that my screwdriver actually had a greasy handle. From me!!! Finally, something that brought me a smile.
At 6:18, my phone rang. In the most professional voice, Mrs. Principal made her move.
“I would like to offer you a First Grade Teaching Position at our school.”
I’ve been offered a teaching position here in my dusty little town on a wide spot of the road! The cornerstone of the community! Is it what I want or what I need? I woke up this morning knowing it is both things and a lot more. Life is complicated that way.
My first classroom, back in 1996, was a 1st-2nd Grade class of 20 bubbly little people including one with very special needs. On one of my finest days, I found myself on a bench in the Autumn sunshine with little Hazel nestled against me showing me she had finally learned how to read the night before. There is nothing as precious or important than teaching a child to read. Nothing better than listening to the sweetest of hesitations as they put together those images while forming their first little words.
I was a bit shocked. But then, I wasn’t. I had aimed in a new direction for very valid reasons. I had applied and then interviewed. I’d done this four times before and hit the bull’s eye each time. Never have I found myself being sorry. Teaching is my calling.
I asked for and evening’s worth of time to pray about my decision. Time to assess this old body that’s been through some stuff over the years. Hours to think about everything that goes into making a year the best for 20 very important little people. A few tears wishing VST were here because he remains my perfect sounding board and source of support. Time to fall into the deepest sleep to dream about schedules, routines, school bells, and students that need me in their lives.
I did have a brief discussion with someone about my pressing decision.
The exchange included words like “Nasty Teacher’s Union”. “NEA” this and “rotten school system” that. I needed to remind him that I am a teacher. Me. Christian Woman. Smart. Independent thinker. Child loving, book toting me. Not every teacher is one for the evening news. Not every school climate follows what you see in big city life. Please remember that. There are millions of teachers just like me. We want to do the right thing for the kids. We want to teach math and language arts. In the privacy of classrooms across the country, learning still goes on the way it has for hundreds of years. With love, patience, respect, and kindness between students and their teacher.
This morning, my decision is made. I need to tell Mrs. Principal first, so you’ll need to wait until tomorrow. This is the tallest cliff I’ve been on for quite some time. Starting college today, I have no more time for nonsense. With purpose and direction, my new path awaits.
More tomorrow.