Ninja Neighbor is the best neighbor I’ve had in my 65 years. Funny, intelligent, spunky, and real, she brightens my life every time we are together. There is a 20 year spread in our ages, but, our spirits mirror each other. I think of how different my move would have been if my house wasn’t next to hers. I love the little path I am wearing as I walk from my front door to hers, over our landscaping. A trip to happiness every time I go.
We are also the kind of neighbors that share when we are in need. “Do you have a..” “Could I borrow a…” These calls always result in a flurry of chatter and chuckles as items are exchanged. I would do anything for this woman and she would for me. She is my family in a town very far away from my own.
Through this wonderful bit of seredipity, many, many family members and girlfriends are now in my circle. Ones I don’t know yet. New Camping friends. New fishing friends. New Gals in Grace. Just new in every way. Last night I got a call, and window into how much fun awaits.”
“Joy, do you have anything that fries stuff?” I am already laughing at the question.
“We just need the cord.” L.O.L. I had an electric skillet that I delivered. Not being the right type of cord, I asked if they would like to try my trusty Ninja 5 in 1, which I would never loan out to anyone for anything, except NN. My kitchen is her kitchen. I returned the skillet and came back with the Ninja 5 in 1.
In the kitchen was the most beautiful array of young women celebrating Teacher Girl’s birthday. TG is NN’s sister, and together, they bring beauty to the word. Friends and sisters in the truest sense. In the kitchen, a group of women were cooking Korean BBQ for TG. All long time friends, they were making this a birthday Teacher Girl would never forget. Busily chopping, dipping, dredging, and sauteing, these women were on a mission of deliciousness.
I was introduced to everyone, but one woman made my night. All of these gals were beautiful, but this one said something that made my heart glow. She validated so much of my hard work this year with the sweetest comment.
Ninja Neighbor had introduced me as her neighbor and an extraordinary writer. She went on and on about the blog, Grievinggardener.com.
“Oh, so you have gardens? What do you grow? How long have you been doing it?”
It shocked me so. She had totally disregarded the grieving and focused my true passion. Gardening. The one that has to do with a focus on life instead of death. The one in which my eyes shine and I smile as my yard changes with the seasons. The one from which WINTERPAST sprouted. A focus on grief was absent. She focused on a normal gardener, who has grieved for 8 months, but who is healing nicely. She focused on me.
“I’m grieving, too.” I added, still processing that she had missed the first word in my domain name.
She stopped and looked into my eyes. “I am so sorry, I didn’t think.” I assured her, her response was perfect in every way.
After a quick visit, I excused myself, needing to get back to Ollie and evening writing. As I inched back through the landscaping, the window in my studio glowed, giving me just enough light to avoid rocks and drip line. My entries for the writing contest needed one last read before sending them into cyberspace. Lost in the four stories I chose, small errors were corrected, and when they were all just right, the SEND button was pushed.
Mr. Fighter Pilot called when I was finished for a quick chat before bedtime. He has no idea how much those calls mean. Sometimes the quiet of the night makes every ghost come out to play. Loneliness is a demon. While on the phone, there was a knock on the door. Very unusual for my house at any time of day.
On the other side was beautiful Ninja Neighbor. In her hands was a plate brimming with Korean BBQ. Everything from the most tender steak to spicy noodles. Panko-crusted shrimp, veggies, and steamed rice.
“The girls wanted you to have a little of everything! Enjoy!” Her smile radiated friendship and love. The food was so delicious. Made with love to celebrate a woman they adore. Love makes everything most special.
Gardener grieving. Names flipped. Different emphasis. I am coming into a new phase of womanhood in which I will grow my soul, spirit, and self. Soon, I’ll be lost in my springtime passion of Iris’s and Peonies. Of blooming fruit trees and the insidious toads that plague me under night’s cover. I will pull out some things and plant others, while singing badly to 80’s music and jumping in and out of the hot tub not yet purchased, but definitely planned. I will watch the stars from the comfort of my comfy lawn, while enjoying the desert I love so much. Grief will be tempered by knowing my marriage was special enough to grieve his loss deeply. I wouldn’t have missed one moment of our lives together for anything.
Happiness is a state of mind. It’s a healthy and safe garden for me to grow my new life. It flourishes in my heart with the help of Ninja Neighbor, Teacher Girl, and all the friends they so graciously share with me. I am a lucky gardener grieving.
Note–My Ninja Neighbor, Trish, and her best friend, Amber, have a delightful Vlog -“Gals In Grace”. You can find them on YouTube sharing tips on cooking, cleaning, and organization. Their last post was a funny one demonstrating “How to Wrap a Present”. Be sure to look up their post on Black Light Cleaning if you need a good laugh. Just remember, don’t get too stressed with the holidays. If things get to you, just take another sip of wine. Trish, I love you, sweet friend. Remember the code word, my Ninja Neighbor.
I got chills as I was reading this story and followed along as if I were there with you. I too love NN and GT. They are gifts from God and are angels on earth. So happy that you have this friendship. NN is who introduced me to your blog and I am so grateful that she did as it has become the most important part of my morning coffee.