Category: 2024

Have you eaten today???? Today is National Better Breakfast Day, so eat something yummy to eat your fast.

I remember those early days of widowhood when it was enough to get dressed. There wasn’t much cooking in those first days here at Winterpast. I relied on some wonderful restaurants for nourishment, risking the possibility of Covid. Through widow’s fog, it was all I could manage to be served, eat, and pay the bill. Perhaps you can relate.

These days, breakfast is a given. HHH is such a great cook! It’s all good because I don’t mind washing dishes while putting everything back in order. He loves cooking and is always looking for new and exciting recipes. Another way we’re a great match.

He delights in surprising me with fresh hash browns or homemade pancakes. One day, while in line at Walmart, I marveled at the gentleman in front of us buying frozen pancakes and waffles. Not in our house. In our house, bacon is on the menu every single day. Eggs. A starch. All enjoyed after asking God’s blessing. Perfectly wonderful.

As a treat, HHH and I wanted to visit the new restaurant in our little town. It’s always fun to try something new, until it isn’t.

In this crazy world, after spending an entire summer creating a new restaurant, you would hope the meals produced in the first few weeks would be better than “Just okay”. We’d heard meals there were FANTASTIC. So, off we went.

“Just Okay” would have been acceptable. What we got was “Just Plain Awful”. Soupy scrambled eggs, runny fried eggs, dry and overcooked sausage, and terrible biscuits with thin and drippy gravy. What a statement about lack of pride in one’s business or job. An all-around zero stars out of 5. In a town of 25,000, the word will spread like wildfire and sadly, another business will bite the dust.

This is the second meal in a week in which we’ve experienced unacceptable customer service or terrible food. The other was in Las Vegas at an establishment with the name of a very famous chef on the door and a surprisingly bad experience once inside. $90 of lunch money later, we left shaking our heads in disbelief. Being married to an amazing cook has wrecked me for eating in the real world. Meals at Winterpast never disappoint, even if I need to do the dishes myself.

The response from both places was to come back and let them show us the “REAL” experience. New business owners forget this important fact. You have ONE chance to make a GREAT first impression. In the case of those two restaurants, that ship sailed.

Only one local restaurant is consistently GREAT in our little town. DENNY’S. The manager is a mountain of a man who works more hours than he is home. He watches every detail like a hawk and checks often to insure his customers are happy with their meals. It is one of the best restaurants I’ve eaten in since moving to Nevada ten years ago. Why so? It’s only a “Denny’s”, you might think. Nope. It’s the best because the manager treats the entire operation as his own, loving his customers and eatery.

The work ethic of our country has been lost . It’s pretty obvious the youngsters working in the food industry don’t quite grasp what it takes to be a GREAT eatery. Soon, they may find themselves wondering what happened to their jobs. All the while, HHH and I enjoy food we’ve grown and prepared ourselves. At this point, it’s not worth the disappointment and effort to try new restaurant food.

Tonight, we’ll enjoy another hand crafted meal. It will be so nice to enjoy a quite moment with the man I love in the privacy of our own home.

Whatever you do today, think of something wonderful for dinner. Try a new recipe. If you must, order something you love, arrange it on a pretty plate, and enjoy a your meal. If you are lucky enough to have a great restaurant near you, hug the manager and know you are very lucky, indeed.

Today is the day we’ll be put to the test. Our Master Gardener class has come to an end and we’ll be questioned on our knowledge of the subject. During two hours combined with gardening experience of 128 years and our study guides, this should be an easy exam to ace. We’ll see.

Throughout this class, we’ve studied many interesting aspects of gardening in our state. Due to geology, the soils of Nevada are very young, lacking organic matter and nutrients. How lucky we were to begin with enriched soil in raised beds. Sometimes, you just need to help Mother Nature along. It sure worked in our favor.

This year, I learned about plants that thrive here on the high desert plains of Northwestern Nevada and those that refuse to grow. Just because the nursery sells something doesn’t mean those plants are well suited to an area. Do your homework before going out to buy plants. Gardening isn’t the inexpensive hobby it used to be when we were kids.

Here at Winterpast, the garden and trees enjoy the last few days of summer-like weather. Soon, they’ll drop their leaves and go to sleep for the winter. HHH and I may suffer a bit while switching our attention to the inner walls of Winterpast, but plenty of houseplants will keep us busy.

During the next week, we’ll prepare for travels to God’s country. Idaho. Montana. Wyoming. Each day, through Yellowstone cameras, I’ve noticed fewer cars. By the time we roll into West Yellowstone, the Tourons (Tourist Morons) should’ve left for the season. Hopefully the bison, wolves, elk, and eagles. will be out to play.

We were considering a helicopter ride over the Grand Prismatic but learned that’s illegal unless you’re a photographer. Colorful photographs are taken from airplanes at least a mile in the air, not from a hovering helicopter. In this day and age, it’s hard to believe our eyes anymore. After hiking to the Grand Prismatic, I’d be disappointed if drones or helicopters hung overhead. Wild nature is just more enjoyable.

We’ll be staying at last year’s little honeymoon cabin. Already having meals in mind, it’s time to start shopping and packing our boxes and suitcases. The AirBnB Host made contact with information about great restaurants and activities. It’s nice to know the locals!

As for the fur babies, they’ll get to visit Puppy Camp once again. Fine by them. In the last few days, they’ve become bored with our routine. It’s wonderful to have canine experts watch over our kids so we can get out and have some fun.

This weekend, we’ll look around for Autumn fun. The last weekend in September means its time for “Street Vibrations”. Motorcyclists from all over the country will converge on the Biggest Little City to the West. Having lived in Virginia City for years, the ground truly rumbles when they all roll into town.

Whatever you do this weekend, take some time to have fun. Enjoy family and friends. Get out and enjoy the fall weather. Be kind to others. Find some smiles. Most importantly, have a happy weekend.

More on Monday.

Doors open and close throughout life. Some slam in our shut, while some might not close completely. Cancer slammed the door of life in my face, not to be ignored. Widowhood is the worst hell anyone can endure, no doubt about that.

After such a loss, it took months to find purposeful direction and more time to choose a new path. Repeatedly, I reminded myself that dark days and darker nights were temporary. Time heals all wounds with faith, hope, and patience.

While I healed on my side of town, HHH healed on his. Both having lost “the best”, we also knew how to BE the best. For the two of us, life alone was a restful period to reflect and regroup. And so, we gardened. He painted his house. I blogged. He cooked three nutritious meals a day. I found Subway. He got a puppy. I tried to train Oliver. He went back to work. I worked around Winterpast. We both cried. We both asked WHY? while shaking fists at the sky. We both suffered through grief. And through it all, we strengthened our faith and healed up very nicely.

Every day, as the gardeners of Winterpast, we continue to heal as we journey through the maze of a new marriage. HHH and I are discovering healthy and fun ways to use our brains. The one place in which we don’t linger is the past. Painting a bright future together, we’ve found a way to move further and further from tears and despair while moving away from the darkness into the light.

Grief is different for each person. Some are so focused on memories that LIFE stops at LOSS. In the early days, sleep came the moment the winter sun dropped below the horizon. Hundreds of balloons were released to soar towards the heavens and away from me. Each exercise was another step away from April 8, 2020 toward the future.

Many widows and widowers disapprove of dating and remarriage. Some had advice that didn’t work for me. Quite a few just didn’t understand.

“I could never…”

“You shouldn’t…”

“How could you…”

“You already had the best…..”

Some helpful encouragement made me more determined to create a happy life different from the one I knew and loved. Not settling for a life of crochet hooks and yarn, (although I do love crocheting and plan to start again soon), I longed for a life mate. So much life remains to live.

These days, life is full of God, gardening, good food, and love. HHH and I thank God for blessing us with a chance to finish life together. Our heavenly angels cheer for us, as we find exciting new activities to fill our days as our hearts continue healing.

While planning meals for next week’s adventure, my thoughts turn back one year. Nervous about the future, I chose love. A safe life without risk is no life at all. With God’s blessing, HHH and I had everything to gain while walking through life’s door of happiness to write our own new chapter.

Life is meant to be lived to the fullest. The term “fullest” is different at every stage of life. If your heart is happy, you are in your perfect zone. But, if you wish for more, move your goal posts. After all, what do you have to lose?

More tomorrow.

The day has finally come. In the last few weeks, my Android phone has been misbehaving while dropping calls and texts. Ten versions behind the newest androids, the time has come to make a decision. Do I stay within my comfort zone or change back to Apple? After careful thought, I’ve decided now is the time to change.

For years, I had a month to month account with Spectrum through Walmart. There were so many thing about that account the worked for me, but the best was the price. $40 a month, unlimited service. The phones I bought were always the oldest versions, but, they didn’t come with a huge cost. The most expensive phone I bought and paid for was $150. It worked for me.

Over years of changing technology, it became cheaper to go with Spectrum and bundle TV, internet, and phone. How do these things start out so affordable, and then increase into very large bills??? It happens to the best of us.

It seems only yesterday that Apple released it’s first version of the iPhone. Sleek and beautiful, buying an iPhone was like buying a fine piece of jewelry. With the best packaging and ease of use, Apple welcomed everyone to their side.

Year after year, Apple phones were less exciting, while the other brands came up with great ideas. How cool it would be to have a foldable screen until that screen develops a crease and stops working. Today, everyone needs the best phone they can afford because every aspect of life seems to trickle through them but when does the price outweigh the benefit?

Old enough to remember back to the days of photographs, slides, and 8mm films, I wish things were that simple today. I still own an 8mm film projector because I’m the keeper of my childhood movies.

Then came the time of 35mm slides. As world travelers, my parents took hundreds of slides on their travels through India, Russia, and China. When they realized that their daughters might want to keep slides of our own lives, we each got a slide projector for Christmas.

After that came smaller and smaller video cameras, until today. Now, it’s all on the phone, leaving Senior Citizens with 8mm and slide projectors that their children won’t have one problem dumping when the time comes.

Last year, during our wedding reception, my bestie took one hundred pictures on her iPhone. Months later, we decided it was time for the transfer transfer. There began the problems for I was Android and she was iPhone. For youngsters, this would be no problem at all. For the older crowd, it took months until we could finally manipulate the photos from her phone to mine.

There have been problems sharing materials with HHH. It’s not a good thing when a husband and wife can’t share pictures of their Yellowstone honeymoon or birthday cruise.

After 17 years without an iPhone, today the conversion will occur. Not sure about learning a new operating system, there’s no time like the present to find out. There’ll probably be many frustrating moments before reaching phone mastery. Please send a few prayers that this transition will go well.

Whatever you do today, evaluate the technology in your life. If you are frustrated with an old computer, printer, or phone, it might be time for an upgrade. Especially in our older years, being online keeps us connected to the world around us. Don’t wait 17 years to change things up.

More tomorrow.

Here at Winterpast, we’ve scheduled weekly activities. Earlier in the summer, HHH decided to golf with the Senior men once a week. That’s opened up the day for all things domestic. Such things as weekly hot tub water care, houseplant inspections, and trash consolidation are on the list. This week, I added some reverse shopping.

The name “reverse shopping” was something I came up with a very long time ago. It sounds more fun than “returns” or “errands”. It’s easy to ignore unneeded items around the house until it’s too late. I wasn’t making that mistake this week. I had a few things that had to go back to their right owners while receiving refunds.

Last weekend, we decided the ground squirrel that’s been burrowing in our yard needed to go. We’ve given him plenty of chances to move along and he hasn’t taken the hint. Once at Lowe’s, we found two options. Make him uncomfortable or make him dead. Ground squirrels are not to be encouraged, full of disease and fleas. They can destroy a yard in very short time with destructive tunnels.

The first option was the kindest. It was a solar device that claimed to emit some type of vibrational sound that rodents detest. I’d heard these devices work well for mice would rather not have squirrel blood on my hands. We bought one.

Along with the sound device, we bought poisonous bait. Finally, the rodent specialist suggested one very big neck-snapping rat trap. We took our purchases home and deployed the bait and trap. Since then, it’s been all quiet in the gardens of Winterpast. I’ll just choose to believe he decided the next door neighbor had a nicer place.

With the Squirrel-Be-Gone device and receipt in hand, I hurried off to Lowe’s for my first return. Weaving in and out of early morning traffic, by the time I got to Lowe’s, I was a little distracted. A black Suburban was also in a huge hurry as it zipped in next to me. It seemed the driver was in a bigger hurry than me.

Grabbing my returns, we exited our cars at the same time.

“Well, Good Morning! Isn’t it a gorgeous day?” I asked in a cheerful voice with smile shining.

Not meaning to startle her, I did. After giving a surprised giggle, she said, “Well, it certainly is!” Caught off guard, it did both of us good to smile and acknowledge the beautiful fall morning and each other.

A simple “Hello” changed the outlook of two busy women stopping for a moment to smile.

A cheerful heart is good medicine;

But a broken spirit drieth up the bones. _{Proverbs 17:22}

I’m not interested in having my bones drieth up any time soon. I can’t wait for the next time someone smiles because of a happy “Good Morning”. These days everyone needs to share smiles in a world that needs some HAPPINESS.

Whatever you do today, try it. Find some unsuspecting person and say “Good Morning” while smiling at them. Tell a stranger they look nice, (if they do). Smile at another driver. Just try to share some happiness and you’ll feel a little better yourself.

More tomorrow.

In widowhood, every chore becomes the responsibility of the one who remains. In my case, car care wasn’t something I’d handled for over 32 years. Someone else knew everything automotive while remaining clueless about the washing machine.

Widowhood and relocation came within weeks of each other for me. About 45 miles away from my new home, 350 boxes waited in storage for retrieval, one load at a time. My first goal was to empty the storage unit in 30 days. Each day, I’d drive on the loneliest highway in the United States, crying a good portion of the trip. I’d load up and drive back home to unpack 20-24 boxes. I never gave the Dodge Ram a thought. Get in. Drive. Load. Drive. Unpack. Period.

After about two weeks of this daily process, I happened to look down when I got out of the truck. To my utter dismay, I saw BALD tires. Not tires with low tread. There was almost NO tread. I’d been driving 90 miles each day on a lonely desert road. Thank goodness there were angels watching over me.

If you aren’t certain about the life left in your tires, do this. Take a penny and put it between the treads. If the top of Lincoln’s head is covered, you have enough tread. If you can see the top of his head, it’s time to have your tires checked out.

Take a good look at the tires. If you have a tire gauge, check the pressure. As fall temperatures drop, so will the pressure in your tires. A small air compressor is a handy thing to have on hand. You can also drop by any tire shop filled with employees happy to help out.

Rotate the tires on the prescribed schedule. Replace tires and brakes when it’s time. Don’t wait until it’s more convenient or affordable. Tires and brakes are critical and can’t be ignored. The problem will only get worse.

With Google at your side, car care ceases to be a mystery. I wouldn’t advise tackling jacks and oil changes if you’re not fluent with wrenches and the workings of an engine. But, there are many things you should be doing at the change of each season.

Inspect the entire exterior of the car, checking for new dings or things that might be ready to fall off. Autumn is a perfect time for deep cleaning of the seats, floorboards, windows, and the mirror. Clean everything.

Test your blinkers, headlights, and brake lights. (This may require the help of a neighbor when testing the brake lights).

Wiper blades last for two seasons, at best. Google is a great place to learn how to change them. Be prepared for sticker shock. They are expensive. Sometimes, the associate will help you do the install. If not, just watch the videos on Google and proceed. Again, not a hard job.

Look under the hood.

When I first did this, I couldn’t get the hood open. There’s nothing more frustrating than searching for the final hidden latch. YouTube is your friend with videos on how to open your hood and check fluids. Remember, one size doesn’t fit all. Know your vehicle’s Year, Make, and Model before beginning.

Perform maintenance at the prescribed times. Don’t ignore the messages from your car. Many auto parts stores will check a code to tell you their meaning for free. Know before you go to a mechanic. Knowledge is key to survival in a man’s world.

If you like shopping for great deals, automotive supplies and services are no different. Walmart and Amazon offer great savings on everything from cleaners to tires. Do your homework because a great discount can save you hundreds. Find your own good deals.

Finally, remember cold weather supplies. Living in a remote area, there are many times an accident can leave motorists stranded while the road is cleared. It’s good to carry snacks, water, a blanket, gloves, and a small repair kit. Being stuck in winter traffic isn’t a joke.

Car Care. It isn’t every person’s dream. Rather than ignoring the entire situation, just deal with it. Research problems, learn as much as you can, and handle it. Knowing your car will give you peace of mind.

More tomorrow.

Just a year ago, as two newlyweds, we took off on the adventure of a lifetime. Marriage! Honeymooning in West Yellowstone, we were stunned by more intense beauty than one place should hold. Driving through Nevada, Idaho, Wyoming and Montana, we stopped to see everything time would allow.

As much as we tried, there were many things we missed.

The Grand Canyon of Yellowstone.

Lamar Valley.

The Grand Prismatic.

Of course, we plan to visit Old Faithful again.

We promise we won’t be Tourons…..

We’ll just go with the flow…

We’ll sleep in and enjoy picnics every day while we wait to see the stars of the park….

The days will end as we enjoy the night sky, something very special in a place called Yellowstone.

Upon our return, we’ll begin our second year as husband and wife. Although our year as newlyweds has been the best we could’ve imagined, life has so much more to offer! We can’t wait for the adventures that await us just around the bend.

Next week, I’ll try to sneak in updates if there’s time and internet service. If not, don’t worry. October 15th I’ll return with lots of new stories to share.

Until then…

Adventure to the Land of God.

An attempt to

Dive into something new

Veering off the normal path

Escaping to

New venues that

Tantalize the senses while

Uncovering sights never seen

Renewing the spirit and

Enriching our souls

Yellowstone

It just doesn’t get better than that! Happy Adventures to you!

Of all the roads both east and west

The one that leads to home is best!

It’s official. One year has passed since HHH and I exchanged wedding vows in a tiny little church on the high desert plains of Northwestern Nevada. The year flew by, packed with lovely adventures and two beautiful trips to Yellowstone National Park.

Yellowstone.

If you haven’t been there, you need to go. If you have, your heart is probably aching to return. (At least it’s that way for us.) It’s one of the most beautiful places in the entire world. In October, that is. At times it seemed we had a private viewing of this majestic place with the first snowfall arriving this week.

While in Yellowstone, we observed wild buffalo, antelope, elk, and mountain sheep from the safety of our car. We saw the elusive Big Horn Sheep, which rested by the side of the road. We even saw a lone wolf in Lamar Valley.

The Grand Canyon of Yellowstone. Stunning. Something found nowhere else in this beautiful world.

Old Faithful didn’t disappoint. On our second visit there, a sister geyser blew up before her.

We walked along the Grand Prismatic and were mystified by the Dragon’s Mouth and it’s stinking steam.

Every day, we picnicked, talked, and laughed as the hours passed, enjoying another beautiful trip during the last days of our honeymoon.

To put a bow on the entire trip we stopped at Yellowstone Bear World, where bear sightings are guaranteed. (71 of them to be exact). There, I bottle-fed five “little” bear cubs each weighing more than the combined weight of Ollie and Wookie. The handlers told us about “their” cub which they’ve mothered for ten months. Everyone behaved well, as difficult as that was for five boisterous little bears and five equally excited tourists.

By yesterday’s sunset, all laundry was finished and suitcases put away until our next adventure. After enjoying a simple dinner, our anniversary melted into a lovely evening of star gazing.

365 days filled with love, God, gardening, and travel have come to an end. We’re on the road through Year 2.

Life.

Love.

Loss.

Grief.

New Life.

With one foot in front of the other, we move towards a beautiful new life. Although you might not see it yet, peace and beauty are right around the bend. Keep moving.

There’s nothing better than canine kisses from our best friends. Unable to join us on our trip to a National Park, our fur babies enjoyed puppy camp. The excitement that overtakes them when they hear the name “Michele” is crazy. She’s the camp counselor they so dearly love. We’re lucky to have a safe place to leave them while traveling.

Yesterday was a typical first day back home. Dogs are so much like children. For the first half of the day, they raced around greeting us with happiness at every turn. Around 1 PM, they began to crash into afternoon nap time while HHH and I worked to catch up on gardening.

Today we’re expecting three consecutive freezes with highs in the 50s. Winter is just around the corner, and with that comes many chores. The biggest is turning off the irrigation water system.

When I moved to Winterpast, the water system was a huge mystery. There were the normal leaks that could throw me into tears. More than that, two electronic boxes controlling 8 stations watering twice daily took time and patience to learn. Drip irrigation is wonderful when it’s working and frustrating when it’s not.

These days, working with HHH, the water system is no longer a mystery. Winterizing the irrigation system is a systematic process that makes perfect sense. Turn off the main valve, and drain the system in for winter. In the spring, do the opposite.

The roses are giving us the last show of the season. With each passing day, there are more dying blooms. They’ve had the last feeding for the season and will soon fall into dormancy until spring. This year, we doubled the number of bushes in our yard. Next year will be even better.

Every day, more of the yard art and empty pots are washed and put away for next year. By mid-November, we’ll be ready to dig out the Christmas lighting and begin preparing for the holidays.

If you live in an area with severe winters, remember to empty fountains and store away your pots and tools. Make a list of tools needed for next year. Christmas is just around the corner. Gardening implements and decorations make great gifts. I’m already preparing my list for Santa.

Ollie and Wookie plan to warm themselves in the last of the autumn sunshine. Their coats are growing thicker, even though they wouldn’t know what to do if forced to sleep outside. So spoiled, they are back with their pack and ready to snuggle with us in the autumn chill.

Whatever you do today, take a few minutes to make of list of your autumn chores. Fall cleaning is always a great place to start. Take time to enjoy autumn’s night sky. If you’re lucky, you might just see the comet.

More tomorrow.

In what seems like a lifetime ago, during a very dark time as a new widow, I never struggled with sleeping. When the sun set, fantastical dreams danced through my head while I slept. Dreaming helped my brain reset.

During one of those evenings, the words “Grieving Gardener” came to me. Waking to the morning sunshine, those words hung in my brain. Just what did the phrase mean? Was I to use the gardens of Winterpast to help other widows and widowers heal? For some time, I thought that was exactly the meaning. I was the original Grieving Gardener.

Then, September 24, 2020 came along and Grievinggardener.com changed everything. God always intended for me to use words to help others, not a shovel or rake. I hope that there are some in this world that have benefited in the smallest way. This insignificant human has spent 54 months sharing random thoughts hoping to help at least one widow.

Another idea was incubating in the back of my brain. Our dusty little town located on a wide spot in the road off an interstate on the high desert plains of Northwestern Nevada lacks a support group for those in grief. Connecting with others in the same situation would’ve been helpful. Quarantined, that wasn’t possible.

In early summer, I mentioned this to our pastor. Why doesn’t our town have a support group? Grief exists in every corner of the world. The widowed need comfort.

As the conversation progressed, he agreed this would be great for our town. Might HHH and I consider facilitating such a group? Could we? Would we?

And so, we sit at the intersection of “We’ve never done such a thing!” and “We have some wonderful gifts to share.”

In the blink of an eye, a flyer nearly jumped out of the computer. December 2, 2024, HHH and I will begin a new adventure. Helping others in need, we’ll continue our personal healing journey.

Trying to think of a name for the group, I found some options on Google. I listed 20 of my favorites hoping HHH might help choose the perfect one. Just like that, tears came. One of the names had meaning that touched his heart deeply. Grief. The journey never ends. We just move through it one step at a time.

Healing Hearts is tedious and time-consuming work. HEALING HEARTS is the perfect name for the new group.

We aren’t counselors. No one has all the answers to make it through the wilderness of grief. We’re just two Senior citizens who’ve lived like everyone else and would like to help others. In doing that, our healing journey will continue.

Whatever you do today, consider how you might help one other person who might be a little worse off than you. There’s nothing better than sharing kindness and love. That can be as simple as smiling at a stranger. You never know how it might change someone’s day. You just might be the one to save a life.

More tomorrow.